I am so tired. I didn't sleep Monday night. Got up at 2:30 on Tuesday morning to leave. Slept from 12-5 and the. 530 to 7 this morning. I dosed off when we got home around 330 but the older kids got home shortly there after and wanted to talk to their mom. So I stayed up. Haleigh wanted to watch cartoons when we got home. She loves pound puppies. I gave her the pain meds and told her she needed to lay on the couch and rest while watching tv. She did and has been asleep for 3 hours. She didn't sleep at all on the way home, it's taken a lot out of her.
The past 24 hours have been transforming.
When Haleigh was born the dr thought she has birth bruises on her face along with 3 little "birthmarks". I didn't see them when she was first handed to me. But after they took her and made sure she didn't need nicu (she was born at 34 weeks) the nurse told me she had a few "spots" on her face and asked me if I wanted to see her. I said and I remember very clearly saying it "give me my baby" she did and I have to say Haleigh looked compleatly normal and healthy to me. I didn't see what they were talking about. The nurse however made sure she pointed it out to me. She told me if I needed her to take Haleigh she would. I told her no and fed her instead. I didn't understand at first why they kept asking if I was ok. Why would I not be ok? I just had a healthy baby girl. I realize now that they thought I would reject Haleigh and I can't see how anyone could reject their beautiful baby. But I guess some mothers do, or they wouldn't have asked. Over the 5 years of her life she has changed so much and her Nevus has as well. She has grown so much and so has the Nevus. It ha also gotten darker and grew hair. Now it's gone and even though she is swollen, the transformation is amazing. She has seen herself and she says she's puffy. Silly girl.
My goodness she was a beautiful baby. I understand some moms being overwhelmed if they knew at birth the course the nevus would take (ending you here 5 years later), I wonder if the nurses were thinking emotionally overwhelmed and not outright rejection of the baby. Either way, I'm glad you loved her as-was. That post-op picture- even swollen looks amazing! She has always been beautiful, but I hope that her road with other kids- who can be so mean- is easy nevus free.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much.
DeleteShe was just adorable....and all that blond hair! The transformation is impressive. I agree, she's always been beautiful but the world is cruel and of course the cancer concerns were scary so this will make her world better. You are an awesome mama and she is a lucky girl.
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