Saturday, January 22, 2011
She is no different than other 2 year old, ok well, she is the smartest 2 year old there is of course, but she is not frail. She is not sick, she is normal. I think we have treated her as if she is slightly frail, and I am now seeing that come out in her in fits! I know all 2 year olds have fits, but this is really my fault!
I have always attended to Haleigh with what ever she needed and would put everything else on hold until she was taken care of. I did that to some point with all my kids, as Jason and I use a lot of Dr Sears' attachment parenting tools, but with Haleigh we used all of them, except co-sleeping, but that was Haleigh's choice to sleep alone, she has changed her mind the last couple weeks though. I think attachment parenting has taught us how to be more attentive parents, more caring, and I think we know our children better because of it. I think our children know what to expect, and what is expected of them, and that we're always here for them all thanks to attachment parenting. I know not everyone uses any of the tools we do and that is fine too, I firmly believe parents should do whatever works for them, not what works for others.
Now for the past month, maybe longer Haleigh has decided that when she wants to do something she's going to do it and if you tell her no she is just going to do it faster before you can get to her. And then when you get to her she is going to cry and scream and kick until either she falls asleep or you give in.
There is no middle ground! Sometimes when she wants to be held, and that is all the time, even when I am cooking she will cry then fall asleep at my feet in the kitchen floor unless I pick her up, and that is not always the safest thing to do. I really think if the sling still fit her she would lay in it all day!
The only thing I can think is its because we have babied her so much that she now expects it all the time. Changing the way we parent is not something we are going to do, but I do believe we are going to have to teach Haleigh some boundaries, that came natural to the other kids by this age, and maybe its just that, maybe the other kids learned them naturally with out much help from us, and for Haleigh it just needs to be taught, just like all else. Math comes ease for some and for others they brew hours of work at it. Haleigh just needs to work at it, and is with her.
She really is a good kid, as long as she is in a good mood! She smiles all the time she is happy, she also knows exactly what she wants, if she doesn't want to wear a dress there is no getting her into it she is set! She know what she likes and what she doesn't. And again there is no changing her mind.
Maybe we just have a strong willed child, a child that knows what she wants, when and how to get it and is firm to it. As an adult that will be something to be very proud of, as a child its something us as parents have a hard time dealing with. Because after all we are the parents!